2pm
since 14th July 2008
crap
Wednesday, August 15, 2007 ( 8:42 PM )
I feel crappy right now. Haven't felt like this for ages.
The tussle of my heartstrings..to care or not to care.
Crap, I wish I knew the answer to everything and had control over every situation.
It sucks to be this vulnerable and be unable to do a single thing except accepting the facts.
I dunno why lately I've been experiencing scares of different sorts.
First, I had my first scare when I felt pain in my upper tooth 1 week back. It was sensitive to cold and hot food and when I touched it, it sort of hurt. Wondering whether it was a sensitive tooth (dentine exposed due to receeding gums) or it was due to cavities (dentine exposed due to acidic erosion of the enamel).
Had to go to the dentist today and I spent like $150 filling cavities. Jia lat, haven't visited the dentist for a few years and this is the lump sum that I have to pay him. The dentist pointed out to me that I have cavities in both of my lower wisdom teeth, and I had the option to puck them out surgically or fill them up. I opted to fill them out, put a stop to the decay, before it attacks my roots. It really hurt when he was drilling away the enamel of the wisdom teeth to make way for the filling. I fear that the decay maybe just the tip of the iceberg and in future I have to endure the pain of surgical removal. Imagine swollen cheeks, bleeding gums, fever after tooth extraction and numbing sensation that comes along with the non-stop drooling of salivia due to anathestic injected into the gums. No, I dun wan that. Brush teeth, floss teeth, and guggle more water after meals.
Second, my beloved ipod nano which was a precious gift given to me by my ex-cg members suddenly went dead on me. I was just connecting it to the computer and trying to synchronise the songs. Pressed eject and removed the usb cable and the ipod nano went DEAD. It refused to start up and I tried to remain as calm as I can. Dug out ipod nano leaflets and went to the website to search how I can claim warranty for my less than 1 year old nano. Luckily, I managed to REVIVE my precious by resetting it accordingly to the instructions given on the website. I thought I singlehandedly destroyed my ipod nano.
Today is just not my day. Boss offered me a ride home, but I was oredi out of sch, @ the mrt station when he msged me. No point hitching a ride when the mrt is right in front of me. I want to hitch a ride home! Travelling to and fro NTU and Lorong Ah Soo, IS TIRING.
I feel so crappy now. I remembered I went to Clarke Quay just today bcos I had to sign some papers with AHA. Then I was so frustrated that I went into the central atrium and bought myself some shoes from Charles & Keith. It's really crazy that I've succumbed to the guilty pleasures of retail therapy, even though I know that I wouldn't be satisfied or happy with whatever materialistic items obtained. I've been SO guilty of retail therapy lately, that I think I should go on a shopping fast for 1 month. Imagine the amount of money I could have saved up in my bank instead of shopping. I need to be more thrifty. Please ask the shop vendors to stop coming to NTU and sell their wares along the outside of the lecture theatres. I'm so tempted bcos I lack discipline when it comes to shopping.
Heck, I'm so crappy that I need to indulge in music and anime to soothe out the feeling of miserability. The rain man is here to stay in my heart. Nobody wants to share my umbrella. I'm not making any sense here unless you've heard Rihanna's song - Umbrella. The bible says "Be slow to anger and quick to forgive." I'm the reverse of what the bible preaches. I'm quick to anger when some idiot says offensive nonsense and I'm slow to forgive and react to sadness. It took the whole of yesterday night to let reality sink in and deal its final blow to me (xiang long shi ba zhang). Boss says, dun be sad, I wasn't sad at that moment, seriously. But i'm really frustrated now. Aiyah.. I should watch lovely complex again and get damn pissed at OTANI for being such a blockhead.
Peace out.